It was a beautiful sunny day with just a bit of a breeze and my husband wanted to go for  bike ride up one of the trails near our home.  I was hesitant as the hill he wanted to climb was rather steep for about a mile and I was not confident in my ability to make it.  He assured me we could turn around at any point so we embarked on our little adventure.  Surprisingly, I had requested only one brief stop midway up the hill before resuming our trek.  Soon the top came into in view, teasing us with its proximity, and we continued until just a few hundred feet from our destination. And then I stopped.  Not a rest stop, but a full on my lungs were burning and my heart felt like it would leap out of my chest at any moment stop.  As I stood gasping, straddling my bike with my feet firmly planted on the ground, my husband encouraged me to rest and catch my breath.  He maintained we could make it, which really meant he knew he could and was trying to make me believe I could as well.  As my breathing relaxed he instructed me to begin riding by heading down hill first before turning back up.  Crazy idea I thought and stubbornly hopped back on the bike with the tires pointed straight up hill attempting to pedal.  Making no progress other than spinning my wheels in the sand, I stopped, completely defeated and gave my husband that look of ‘I’m done and knew I couldn’t do this’ at which time he again encouraged me to try riding down hill first.  Shrugging my shoulders I gave it a try.  Then the magic happened.  Heading back down hill gave me enough momentum that I was able to turn back up hill and made it to the top of the trail.  Progress!

Rather an interesting concept this thing we call progress.  In some instances it is easy to define and establish what constitutes progress.  In other cases it is rather elusive.  And to make things a bit more interesting what one person perceives as a lot of progress may appear to be minimal or none to another.  Yet, it is an integral part of our activities as we establish goals, make plans…just experience this thing we call life.  

One thing I have learned for myself with regards to progress is that it looks different day to day.  Some days I am full of energy and things just seem to click along and flow together, kind of like making all the green lights as you head through town to work.  Other days every light is red and just the effort to accomplish one thing is monumental.  There are days I am able to hold space for everyone, including myself, with grace and a smile and others when not only can’t I hold space for myself but everyone else better stay away as well.   And that’s okay.  Every day is different. Every experience is different.   

I have also learned it is the week to week or month to month view that provides a better perspective.   Even those upon examination sometimes  don’t measure up to what I had hoped because there are times you have to rest or perhaps catch your breath. Sometimes you just have to sit the song out and regain your bearings. Other times what appears to be a lack of progress or even backwards steps result in moving forward.  Like the bike ride up the trail that almost defeated me until I took my husband’s advice, progress is not necessarily linear and not always easy to see.  That is some of the beauty of this journey.  Or in Gilda Radner’s words, the delicious ambiguity of life.  

Wishing you dear friends much joy as you experience the delicious ambiguity of life on your heartfelt journey.  ~♥~